Tag: Lies

It has been quite a while since I’ve posted on this blog and the reason that I have stopped for a while is because my life is going great and nothing dramatic has happened as I lead a pretty simple life. But, something I heard yesterday that bothered me and hurt me deeply. Last year around this time I met a friend. This friend of mine is someone that I believed to be one of the good ones, one of those that you have a hard time finding. I subsequently met this person at my work and it was almost too good to be true. The first night I worked with her, I couldn’t believe how great and funny she was and she also couldn’t miss a beat when it came to understanding things that were on my mind that night. I believe we just talked about travels that we had both made and also a few other strange happenings taking place at work. The first time we hung out was after work and it was the usual business that usually happens when a guy and girl get together to talk about life. I said to myself , “This is why I’m still here, for people like this and all the experiences that I share with them”. The conversation we had that night had me thinking that this girl might like me but I said whatever and there couldn’t possibly be any interest whatsoever. But, the more I saw her, the more I figured that she too had the same feeling that I did. I felt we had a really connection at that time as we shared so much in common. Even though we didn’t share some interests (music and movies mostly), I felt our lives were somewhat parallel in that we had some tragedies and triumphs that we had both experienced. This helped get through some of the fun that we had due to the sometimes outrageous topics that we would run into. After hanging out a few more times, I felt this person was really someone that I could call a really good friend. I saw movies with her, had some fun lunch and dinner conversations with her, took some fun walks with her, and I also found myself listening more than I did talking. If there is anything I am good at, it is listening to people whether it is something great that has happened to them or something horrible that has happened to them. The more I listened to some of her jargon, the more I felt that most of her life was booked on the fly with her impulses taking over instead of her thinking about it. For example, one time we were meeting up and she insisted that I had to one day visit her home state which, after some serious thinking, would not have been a good idea. I knew in my head that having friends like this was difficult and hard on my head. Throughout my life, I have had my friends leave me or just lose contact with me. I may not see them for a really long time and when and if I see them it just feels really awkward to see them. I couldn’t stand to lose her because of how she kept going back and forth of staying here and going back home. It was almost as if I wasn’t meant to keep the same friends for a prolonged period of time because of how different personalities clash and how we go through our lives with different goals in mind. I believe her goal was that she wanted to live life on the mend. I saw her on and off for the beginning of the summer and it was like heaven. It was the most fun that I had since the last time that I had a friend like that. We would have some early afternoon lunches on our days off and sometimes before work. As I said before, most of the time we spent discussing life and it was very refreshing and awesome to get someone else’s opinion on what was going on in your life. But, something occurred to me, and it was the fact that she was very mysterious. I would sometimes ask her how school was going and most of the time she was very vague and not very detailed. The typical answers were “good” and “ok”. During the late part of the summer, I would sometimes take her to work because of “car trouble” and I started seeing the cracks in the armor. I was getting ready for work and I got a text message detailing how she had some car trouble and she had trouble getting to work. I said “if you need anything please let me know”. But, then things got stranger and when I was pulling into work one day I saw her driving the same car that she had been talking about that same day that she couldn’t possibly drive. I had no choice but to keep my mouth shut and my eyes open for any clues as to what else she could be lying about. As time went on, she would give some hokey reasons as to why she couldn’t hang out a certain day. I hate being lied to and this one really hurt. I started noticing that our hangouts got less frequent due to circumstances that were apparently out of her control. One example I can think of is when we were scheduled to go to a concert together and all of a sudden she said she said she had to sell the tickets them due to something that had come up. She kept insisting at this point in time that “she could understand if I didn’t want to be friends anymore”. This upset me because I believed her to be one of the good ones and I believe she sold the tickets because she felt bad for having me come along for someone I didn’t care to see in concert. She never told me why she sold the tickets other than something had come up. This is where all the lying began and after this it just got worse. In the fall, she had apparently hurt her foot and out of all the things to get her out of work it has to be her foot. She only told me once that she had fallen down her stairs and I thought how strange that someone would fall down there stairs in order for this to happen. I understand that a foot injury or a sprain is tough to go through, but I kept insisting that we should hang out but everything had to be on her time and every time I would ask her to do so she had no answer other than “I’m busy”. What was interesting was that a friend of mine at work said she had spoken to this person and she said that she was “bored” and there has to be something else to do other than being on the internet all day. This upset me and once I again I wasn’t going to confront her about because that would not be worth the trouble. I have had a few friends that have had sprained foots but they came back within a month to work but she took 3 months which was surprising due to her take on how her pain was. From my talking to a good friend, his take was that most X-Rays were inconclusive and it was difficult to determine the severity of an injury unless you spoke to that one person that felt the pain. This way you got a doctor’s note that could say that you were unable to work. I saw her on again off again for a couple months until November 7th which was one of the few times I saw her for what she really was. We decided (actually she decided) that she and I should take a trip to San Francisco and once again it was done on the fly. She once again surprised me because of her compulsive buying and expensive spending on gifts for some people that she would only see maybe once or twice a year. I understand some people are like this but how did she gets so much money from working a job in retail? I figured “maybe her family helps her out” but there was no way of that happening? Was I crazy for thinking that? It was a very fun trip and that to me was the “finale” of what was our friendship as we didn’t talk that much thereafter. We would go back and forth about a few things but she ultimately decided that California was not the best place for her and she went back home in December. Apparently, she was finishing her Master’s degree in order to go and teach in her home state. She said she had a friend that worked over there and she would possibly be ready to go and work there for a couple of months. However, I found out yesterday from a good friend of mine that he saw her on Facebook a few weeks back saying that she was in Las Vegas. I once again wondered “how does she have all this money and is she really over there teaching?” It hurt so much to hear that and it was almost as if our friendship never happened and she is just a distant memory now. It hurt because I believed she was going back home to help her family out and focus on her education but now I hear this and it once again is another lie. Why do people lie? I’ll probably never know but my thought is that people are afraid to know who they really are and they look for something to make sure they look like a million dollars. Nobody wants to be seen as a loser and in this case I believe she was running away from something. It could be she was running from a person, a life event, personal issues, or something that had happened in her past. I saw her as a good person and she still resides in my heart as being somebody that can really be good. If you are reading my friend, I hope you know that I have written this to get some closure on my behalf and I hope you can come to terms with who you are. It is my belief that some of the lies that you told me did really hurt and I hope you are enjoying your life. If that is the way you wish to enjoy your life then so be it, every human expects the best out of there lives and why should yours be any different? As for me, well I’m over the fact that we were friends for a couple of months and I’ve moved past the fact that you were the way you were. Lying is the worst possible way to get what you want and I hope you understand that and I chalk up as another life lesson. I don’t know why I met you, maybe it was to teach me that life brings us the good and the bad. At the middle of the road, you and I met and it was the best of both worlds. These words said and typed here meant something here today and if anything it serves as reminder that we get what we want but we don’t get what we have. I wanted a friendship and instead I got a reminder that life is full of journey’s and mishaps and what not. For now, we’ll just have to see what comes in the future and who knows maybe I’ll meet someone down the line that feels the same way I do. Thank you for reading I hope you understand, Goodbye and good night!